Funeral Celebrancy
The death of someone we love, or are close to, is a pivotal moment. We are often jolted out of our ‘normal’: the essentials of life come into focus, while the humdrum issues of our daily life feel much less important, at least for a while. The death can trigger the pain of grief, the sharp edge of loss, as well as confusion, denial, sadness, anger and at times, relief.
I am available to help you navigate this time and to prepare for the funeral service/ celebration of life.
This will offer a space to honour and grieve the loss of your loved one, while also being a celebration of their unique life and gifts. It is my role to work with you to help craft the celebration using chosen stories or anecdotes of your loved one, with suitable music, poems and readings.
The Service
A standard service will usually follow a similar structure to what is given below:
Arrival and taking of seats, during a chosen musical track.
A welcome from me, thanking everyone for attending.
Sharing of stories of your loved one by myself.
Possibly, a contribution from one or more others – family or friends -sharing their memories/ stories of your loved one.
Sharing a poem or two which best encapsulates who they were.
We can also include a photo montage of favourite images of your loved one, usually alongside another piece of music.
Ending of the ceremony with the committal, alongside words of appreciation and comfort from myself, and a final musical choice.
Everything is open, nothing fixed, and my work would be to help craft the best possible service that honours the life of the deceased and help support all those present.
How we will work together
In planning a funeral service / celebration of life, there are 3 key stages in the process:
First meeting
I will arrange a first meeting with you, as a key family member and/or next of kin. I appreciate this first meeting will come at a poignant time for you, and hence we can take it at your own pace. The purpose of the meeting is to gain a wider understanding of what you would like in the service, and as much as possible, gather stories/ anecdotes of the deceased, along with chosen musical tracks and images. We can also discuss a poem or two, that encapsulates the deceased, and any chosen readings.
Keeping in touch
Following the first meeting, I will keep in regular contact with you, and the Funeral Director, as the design of the service begins to take shape. You can contact me whenever you need to, and I’ll keep you informed as the different stages of the service become clearer. Nothing is fixed; all is open to change or improvement. The purpose is to gradually craft a service that best represents the unique life and gifts of the deceased, and enables the family and perhaps friends to express their unique memories and feelings for the deceased.
The Service /
Celebration of life
On the actual day, I will be there at the venue to welcome you when you arrive, to support you throughout, and to skilfully guide the service from beginning to end, sharing the chosen poems, images, musical pieces, readings as appropriate. This service is an important stage in the process of grief/ loss; an opportunity to let go of the body of the deceased, and to gather in order to mourn and appreciate their unique life and presence.
Cremation
The cremation of the body is now the most common way of committing a body after death - an offering of the body into the element of fire. The subsequent ashes can be interred in a burial site, or a private garden perhaps, or scattered where appropriate.
A crematorium is set up for such services, with an appropriate space for the service, video links, music system and a clear process of arrival and departure. The time duration of the service will depend on the particular crematorium. For example, Llanelli crematorium’s standard service is 40 minutes in duration, Swansea’s crematorium is 30 minutes. These times include the time of arrival and departure.
If cremation is the option you choose, I can tailor the service to the required length and guide the service utilising the crematorium’s resources accordingly.
It is also possible to have a direct cremation at a crematorium, ie with no service. This can apply when the celebration of life, or the funeral service, has taken place elsewhere – see the Alternatives below – or when no funeral service is required.
Burial
There are now two different options available for burial, which can be prearranged prior to death, or arranged at the time of death:
Church or Chapel Burial Site
This was the traditional method of committing a dead body, and still the preferred option for many today. It is often available to parishioners of a particular church or chapel and/or arranged with an appropriate church representative.
Natural Burial Site
This is a steadily growing option to traditional burial. Natural burial sites are often situated in open countryside spaces, and blessed with trees, flower and the energies of nature. They often do not permit plastics, or embalming fluids, as their rationale is one of sustainability – burying the body often in a soft wooden coffin, or shroud, which is easily biodegradable along with the body. Here the body is offered back to the earth. There may be no memorial, or a simple stone inscription of the name of the deceased, with an option to plant a tree, or flowers to honour the burial place.
Read this article from the blog to learn more about natural burial.
Alternatives
A funeral service/ celebration of life can also take place elsewhere, for example, in a community hall, a private home, or a natural setting such as a woodland.
All that is required is the gathering of family and friends, along with the body of the deceased (sometimes this is absent) and a chosen minister or celebrant, such as myself, who will hold and guide the service.
Such an alternative venue will often be free of the time constraints of a crematorium, and thereby offer more flexibility and creativity within the service.
Afterwards, the body can then be cremated, perhaps via direct cremation, or buried as is wished.
Book a free call
If you’re needing support or feeling curious to explore working together, don’t hesitate to get in touch for more information, with no obligation, we can book in a free call to discuss your needs and see if I can support you.