Fostering Resilience in Uncertain Times

The nature of life is constant change. However hard we cultivate and hold on to stability, security and safety, inevitably sooner or later we will experience the uncomfortable nature of such change - something that we can’t control and can perhaps shake the very ground under our feet. In such times, resilience is a quality that we can draw upon to stand up, stay at least relatively balanced and remain open to the Intelligence of Life as it is.

What follows are some key principles in fostering resilience:

Steadfast Support: Having a few genuine friends around us when we need them is such a blessing; people who can offer us a non-judgemental listening space, who can remind us of our unique qualities (1), yet without offering trite platitudes or trying to ‘fix’ our issues. We don’t need many but having a few such steadfast friends can be so supportive.

Likewise, we can develop our own capacity to offer such a supportive space to our friends or colleagues for whenever they are facing adversities. The more we can offer this blessing to others, the more they may be willing to offer it to ourselves.

Yoga Practice as Medicine: When challenges arise, a daily or regular yoga/ meditation practice becomes even more beneficial. It can help down-regulate our nervous system, balance and boost our energies, and provide some much-needed stillness and steadiness. Such regular practice can be seen as a medicine that we keep taking even when we may not feel like it! So many practices can be helpful but two of them - Nadi Shodhana pranayama (2), or alternative nostril breathing, and Yoga Nidra (3) - can be especially useful in balancing our energies and calming our nervous system.

When times are uncertain, difficult, fearful, full of change

They become the perfect place to deepen the practice of awakening

Jack Kornfield

Turning to face Reality: We are often hardwired to focus on pleasure and avoid pain. Fair enough, yet the more we can turn to face the reality of our situation, the more we train ourselves in resilience. Once we are clear on what we are facing, we can proactively move forward. This includes facing our emotions and thoughts. Emotions can often be suppressed, for very good reasons at times. Yet ongoing suppressed emotions drain our energy and reduce our effectiveness in dealing with the present moment situation. Within our capacity, we can learn to welcome emotions more as they arise and let them move through us, especially if we can share them honestly with a steadfast friend as above, or perhaps a counsellor. Confidence gradually grows that we won’t fall apart, that we can allow anger, sadness, grief and so on to move through us like the clouds move through the sky, and still be ok.

Likewise with our thoughts. So often we add to our difficulties in the way our mind creates its own dramas, on top of the actual situation of our life, through its reactions, projections and opinions. As Mark Twain so aptly put it:

My life has been filled with terrible misfortunes, most of which have never happened.

As often as possible, perhaps by slowing down our breath or sharing with a good friend, we can notice what terrible misfortunes we are creating in our mind, and inwardly smile at them. Then come back to the actual situation in front of us, endeavouring to let go of additional reactions and projections (4).

Glass half full: especially when times are difficult, we can easily get caught in judgement and self-criticism. Hence, the glass can feel half empty or worse! Rather than getting lost in this, can we take the opportunity to cultivate a more optimistic approach. Whatever we don’t have, be grateful for what we do. Gratitude and optimism can foster the spirit of generosity – a focus not only on what we need but also what we can give to Life - and in turn generosity breeds abundance. Even if this feels only idealistic initially, what have we got to lose in trying?

Letting go and trusting Life: Cultivating a glass half full approach also opens the possibility of trusting in Life itself; the Intelligence that enables the grass to grow, the sun to shine and the breath to flow in and out, to use three of countless examples. The more we can trust in Life, however tentative this may be at first, the more we can relax into it. This is not a passive blind trust - we still need to be proactive, stay grounded and have our eyes wide open. It is a trust that grows the more we recognise that Life’s Intelligence is not designed to make our life a misery, but fundamentally to help us grow in our humanity, understanding and wisdom, often through the challenges of Life (5).

These qualities help to foster resilience, which enables us to more effectively face the inevitable vicissitudes of life with a greater inner strength, balance and trust. In doing so, we also act as ‘role models’ for others facing their own challenges. In our uncertain world, such resilience is a genuine gift, both for ourselves and others around us.

References

(1): Thereby counterbalancing our tendency to focus on the perceived negativities within ourselves and/or our life.

(2): Focus, without expectation, on developing a comfortable 1:2 ratio with guidance if needed from a skilful yoga teacher. Nadi Shodhana pranayama, practised for say 10 minutes once, or even twice/ three times a day, can be so beneficial when dealing with anxiety/ stress.

(3): Some yoga nidra recordings are available free of charge from the free resource library on the Ashram website - www.mandalayogaashram.com/resource-library

(4): The Buddha’s teachings on the 2nd arrow illuminates this principle very well.

(5): This is Arjuna’s story in the 1st chapter of the Bhagavad Gita, a key foundational text of yoga.